I am a great admirer of magnets

They are so uncomplicated

Note tell George Borrow Tomorrow

Seriously these words are worthless

In a world full of hope

Why hope my friend

I do not hope to be wealthy

That is an abstract

It is not even a dream

Yesterday I was given two books

A copy of the Bible

And a study of a philosopher

The likeness on the cover suggested

That the said philosopher wore glasses

Which is incorrect as he never wore glasses

That is very confusing Honey Bee

I was in Bath yesterday

When some Christians knocked at the door

I ignored them as I was covered in suds

They posted a leaflet through my door

Do Magnets Masturbate

Its subject was how to resist the urge to masturbate

Through God and the Bible

I found it very amusing as the Bible

Does not mention masturbation

Which suggests that God does really not give a fuck

Methinks it is the work of those

Who are ashamed of their sexuality

Or who are ambiguous to say the least

I was having a miserable day

And this was very dunnie funnie

So I popped down to the local church

And left a fiver diver in the wall safe

Before I close my friend

Let me assure you

That these events

Have not inhibited my admiration

Of magnets 1+2+3