I have a step sister named Judith

She recently had a decent well paid job

And then out of nothing she was dismissed

This seemed unusual to me

So I asked her the reason why

It seems that the guy

Who owned the company

Was a sleaze who made Judith’s life hell

Without going into explicit detail

He made unwelcome advances

And touched her inappropriately

As well as suggesting illicit meetings

She tried to take action against him

But found it hard as the cops

Saw her as a brassy northern girl

And then she was made redundant

Under the cover of restructuring

This shattered her as she felt used and dirty

It was then that I hatched a plan with Judith

Which was unlikely to fail as I was dead

I found out that the sleaze liked bubble tea

And popped into Bubble Cafe Green at least twice a week

Mostly when the tiny Japanese waitress was on duty

Judith contacted him and said that she had been mistaken

And might they meet up for a chat in the bubble cafe

He fell into our trap straight away

And this is where I came in

I dressed as a psychopath and sat opposite them

And waited until he went for a piss

I followed him into the pastel toilets

And as he held his filthy dick cut his fucking throat

I also stabbed him between the shoulder blades

It was as I was leaving the toilet

That I noticed that the cubicles

Were painted in three different colours

The sleaze’s death site was turquoise splattered red

Whereas the others were a dove grey and a gentle lavender

I actually admired these calming colours a great deal

And thought about them as I left the cafe via a back door

Judith raised the alarm after about ten minutes as planned

And was initially associated with the crime

But it was obvious she was totally innocent

Even when her sad history came to light

She later found another job with decent people

And I returned to where I had originated

The bubble cafe after being closed for a while

Reopened and because of its macabre reputation

Became incredibly popular so popular

That another outlet was soon opened across town

When I was alive bubble tea was just coming in

I tasted it once and thought it to be expensive dogs piss

My step sister has similar thoughts

But likes some bubble teas especially the milky ones