Joe
Sam
May I begin the interview
Please
Do men ever send dick pics to you
Only my friend Richard
What would you do if you received a dick pic
Feel sick
Have you ever sent a dick pic of yourself
Only when I was doing Shakespeare
So I would guess that you were less than impressed with the latest scandal involving a Tory MP
I was disgusted
It is bad enough that MPs and others in senior positions are caught out by gold diggers and slags but this is going too far
These men have to behave responsibly it is all part of the job
If any part of the bridge cracks then it will only take a storm to bring it down
Do you think that this has been made worse because the MP was gay
Very much as many people are still disgusted by homosexuals
I think that if your local MP was caught between a tarts legs then people would think him weak and careless
But there is nothing very sordid about it
Men like women men fuck women men should not fuck other men as it a form of decay and corruption
Indeed in France it is quite chic to have a mistress
What about you
What about me
Would you have a mistress
I am not French and as you might have noticed Josephine is enough for me
What do you think of Clause 28
I totally supported it
If I was in government I would bring it back updated tomorrow to include other perversions
It was a very sensible piece of legislation
You are obviously too young to remember the decriminalisation of male homosexuality in the sixties
Yes
Your father was a vicar was he not
Yes and his father before him
What were his thoughts
He thought it was a huge mistake and in future years we would regret it
Did this influence you and your sister
Josie and I were brought up in the church
What was it like
Was it restrictive
No
Have you any memories
Only that it was draughty
The main thing was it gave you a structure to understand life
I have friends that say that any person has a right to love anybody they like
Just think what you have just said Sam
Is it a freedom or something else
I love my fellow man but if I think that they are acting in an irresponsible manner then I will tell them so
Some people have suggested you are homophobic
Are you
That is just a label
Are you
No
I just know what is wrong and what is right
What would you do with the MP if you were his boss
Forgive him
God forgives sinners
Are you God
God no
I would ask him to reflect on what he has done
That is all
Joe I have heard that you like jokes
I do
Then may I tell you a couple of jokes
Please go ahead
My friend went for a dodgy massage and noticed that if he paid an extra fiver then extras were available
This he did but instead of a wank he was given a cup of tea
I like it
My friend is something of a masochist
He was tied naked to a rough table
And asked the dominatrix to hurt him
So she told him that his cat was dead
Fin