The Little Blue Glass Pyramid and Muriel go to Clacton
It was a very hot summer’s day in Clacton during what had been quite an ordinary summer
The Little Blue Glass Pyramid and Muriel had left their lodgings quite early and were walking towards the beach
As normal The Little Blue Glass Pyramid was in a foul mood
He did not like crowds and Clacton was full of very pale people who had saturated the small seaside town
Before we go to the beach let’s pop into a newsagents and buy a Sunday paper
A middle aged cyclist dressed entirely in Lycra passed them on the narrow pavement
Hey there is a road there you bloody idiot
Really Blue do you always have to react when someone rides on the pavement
It is because I cannot stand men in Lycra cycling on pavements
Whatever do they look like?
There is something a little perverted about men wearing Lycra
Be quiet Blue
And they have the cheek to ride on pavements
Be quiet Blue
Because they are afraid that the big nasty cars might squash them
Teach then a lesson
Be quiet Blue
Muriel stopped outside of a newsagents shop and picked a copy of the Daily Mail from the rack in front of the main display window
Make yourself useful and pay for the paper
I will choose a couple of postcards for Florrie and Florrie
Just across the road from the newsagents there was a scruffy weathered bus shelter where both The Little Blue Glass Pyramid and Muriel could see a child of about eight crying
Her mother looked slightly at a loss as to how to quieten the child
Do you think that she needs assistance?
I would keep out of it
None of our business
Muriel ignored her husband and crossed the road
Sorry to poke my nose in but can I help?
Have you purchased a Daily Mail today?
Yes
Are you planning to keep the free gift?
No I was planning to bin it
I know this is a cheek but little Cherry Cherry here has lost her how to identify your visitor from outer space identification pack and has not been able to help her alien who then ran away
But she has found another one
Muriel glanced up and saw the visitor from outer space standing half hidden in the shadows
Blue you do not want the identifiy your visitor from outer space identification pack do you?
Why should I
Waste of time
Send them all back I say
Muriel pulled the small polythene bag from the newspaper and handed it to the child
There you are my dear call your alien friend over and now you can identify him
It encourages them you know
I do not know why the newspaper did it in the first place
I have a thought to write to them
Many will have the same idea as me
Be quiet Blue otherwise we will not visit the beach
The mother of the child took the alien by his hand and led him towards the bench next to her daughter
Just follow the directions my dear
The child pulled the green numbered sticker from the adhesive pad
What is your name?
Ado
Ado?
Yes ay dee ooo
With a surprising dexterity the child added the details of the alien onto the sticky badge
NUMBER 101 NAME ADO
The child stuck the badge on to the worn jacket of the alien
Now be off with you and do not leave the town or the police will bring you back
The alien smiled
NUMBER 101 NAME ADO I AM ADO
Say thank you to the kind lady Julie Julie
Thank you that was gracious of you and The Little Blue Glass Pyramid
Nothing to do with me
Send them back I say
The mother and the child left the bus shelter and walked in the general direction of the fun fair
If you do not cheer up then you will not go to the beach
You are spoiling the day
I am serious you will not sit on the beach and have people admire you and your wonderful colours
The Little Blue Glass Pyramid was reading the bus timetable
Are you finished?
I was waiting for you
Before we go to the beach and don’t moan about it I am going to pop into The Magic Rainbow Sparkling Rock Shop
Why
To look around
I always visit The Magic Rainbow Sparkling Rock Shop when we are in Clacton
I do not remember going into that silly shop
We come all this way and all you do is waste time in sweaty shops
The Magic Rainbow Sparkling Rock Shop is not a silly shop
I just want to sit on the beach and be admired
Then behave yourself
Muriel and The Little Blue Glass Pyramid walked along the coastal path towards the new development where The Magic Rainbow Sparkling Rock Shop was now located
They entered through the automatic doors
Now just stay here and do not move and try not to look so bored
And whatever you do never progress into the store
You remember what happened last time
You were purchased by a family from Lincoln and spent two weeks in that city before I found you
Happiest two weeks of my life
Stop muttering if you want to say something say it
I will stay here
And then we will go to the beach
Do not stray
And that is where the day ended
Muriel brought a selection of rock from The Magic Rainbow Sparkling Rock Shop and then as promised The Little Blue Glass Pyramid was allowed to go the beach where he was much admired
He also met The Small Yellow Dot who was appearing for the season at the Summer Theatre
As for the visitors from outer space the initiative by newspaper was ill prepared and the gum used on the badges proved ineffective
Within the day most of the free identify your visitor from outer space badges had become detached
This caused the local police something of a problem as many of the visitors from outer space became disorientated and wandered out of the town and became lost in rural Essex