In the High Street not far from the church there is a bookshop that sells nothing but the H.G.Wells novel

Tono-Bungay

There are over six thousand stocked

As I had run out I popped into the bookshop on my way back from the marmalade factory

On Saturdays it was staffed by a German woman retro punk in appearance with bright pink hair

I asked her why the book had such an unusual title

She confessed ignorance and suggested that I speak to the author himself

I said that this would be impossible as Well’s died in 1946.

The woman who had originated from the GDR and was married to an ex-homosexual noted that if I visited the shop at a quarter to eight that I would be sure to catch him before he died