Raymond Killer was a Dachshund

A Sausage Dog if you like

He was owned by a couple so boring

That he was surprised that they ever woke up

Yet he secretly fancied the wife Christine

And wanted to fuck her hairless cunt

Raymond was therefore secretly pleased when Christine

Used his tail to pleasure herself

When her husband as out

He used to lay on her naked lap

Thinking of Modern German History

And how the country had shaped itself

Between Hitler and the Baader-Meinhof Group

Raymond fancied himself as an urban terrorist

But only shit in the posher parts of town

As guns and bombs were prohibitively expensive

When his owners moved to the USA

They gave Raymond to Henriette Heinze

With whom he immediately bonded

But that is another bitch bitch story

And does not have a place in this brave poem