I have friends in the Channel Islands who insist that they are not in Normandy
This however is not true as they are part of Normandy as much as Cherbourg Rouen and Le Havre
Dogs and bitches are often called Norman and Joan in defiance of this reported geography
I have no such problem as I am called Bonzo Beach after Bonzo Beach the French artist
Whose real name is Tina which is my middle name
My sister who is a very beautiful nun is named The Perfect Normandy or Sister Norm for short
I never wanted to become a nun as I chatter endlessly about inane subjects such as this poem
Rip tides also interest me as well as weather patterns in the South Atlantic
You may think that I am an odd fellow but I am happily married to my sister
We have considered children but have delayed our decision as we are worried about the primroses
That cling precariously to the pink pink cliffs and the rear of our garden which are falling into the sea
The Mother Superior (Barbie) feels that we are being foolish as she has built a creche in the convent
But she sees our views and blesses them as he knows that any loss of primroses might upset the infant and cause the guard dogs to harm self harm
I have spoken to the dog about this and he has assured me that he is taking Holy Orders even though she holds pantheist beliefs
My other guard dog is called Fashionista Ken but it has never come out of its kennel which maybe due to the fact that it fell into the sea in 1945
We do have another dog with very big eyes (although it is blind) but we have never enquired of its breed
I think it is a sheepdog named Killer but a couple novitiate nuns disagree and we often discuss this at naturist retreats in Southern France
Fin