For most of his adult life Tommy Parker wore a fez

He was wearing it when he was hit by the train

And although Tommy was spread over many counties

The fez survived and was sold at auction soon after

To a gentle man from Marseilles

I am that man and I walk the streets of this southern city

Trying to make people laugh even though they are quite poor

The trouble is that because of my imperfect hearing

I do not speak French very well

My jokes fall on deaf ears and are misunderstood

This has caused me some concern and I am considering

Changing my name to Tommy Parker

But this will not happen as I have received threatening letters

From his ghost who is still sore with me as I now own the fez