I was the youngest of six children
And was the only boy
We were all born within a period of ten years
But I was always treated as the baby of the group
Which I enjoyed a great deal as I was doted upon
My sisters all had names beginning with M
Martha Mary Marlene Colin and Maude
I was called Marcus Mark which was a name that I really enjoyed
Especially as my second name was Millar
My sisters satisfied my every need
Both physically and mentally
But I did not grow up spoilt
Far from it
They found me friends and I was given a cat each year for my birthday
From an early age I wanted to be a Member of Parliament
Which was not not surprising as we all lived in Henley-on-Thames
Martha Mary Marlene Claudia Colin and Maude vetted all my girlfriends
Which was very important as I attended many official functions
At the age of twenty-three I became the MP for Henley-on-Thames
It was the first by-election where nobody voted for the opposition as I was so good looking
My sisters found me a wife who was rather plain
But assured me that I could trade her in when I became a junior minister
They kept their promise and rewarded me with a girlfriend who resembled a rabbit
She was far brighter than me having received an Oxford first which helped me out no end
As I travelled at speed up the party tree
She and my sisters wrote all my speeches and shaped my comfortable views
I am due to meet the Queen next week and will be asked to form the next government
With my girlfriend who looks like a rabbit and my five sisters whose names begin with M
I am planning to employ my many cats as political advisors as long as they do not mind travelling north