I often go to the nude beach with the vicar’s daughter

From a distance we can see a row of shops

I am told that they are a Marxist collective

 

The vicar’s daughter is totally uninhibited

Unlike her sister who is a nun

She often feels the heat

When we are on the beach

I suggest that she removes her habit

But she tells me that she is naked underneath

 

On the path to the beach

There is a green and white sign

That expressly forbids levitation

 

The vicar’s daughter and I

Often discuss infinity

When swimming in the sand

She believes that infinity is perfectly visible

Be we tend to censor the freedom of our thoughts

 

Although I am told

That there are fish in the sea

I have never seen any of these creatures

It has been suggested

That this is a trick of the light

 

Although we are quite naked

I bear no erotic feelings

Towards the vicar’s daughter

If I did then these feelings

Might have a detrimental impact

On the cartons of cereals

That can be found in the locality

 

The vicar’s daughter told me

That her most erotic experience

Took place on a railway station

When she saw three identical twins

Sitting next to each other on a station seat

None of them were wearing underwear

 

I have never experienced

An erotic moment

As I do not travel by train

 

My name is Colin

It has always been Colin

The vicar’s daughter

Is named Agatha Jane

But she likes to be called Colin