My name is Mischa

I am currently working as car park attendant at The Open

It is a steady job even though it is temporary

Occasionally I see one the big names

They seem very nice

Up to five years ago I was an addict

And liked the idea of being dominated

This brought me into contact with the wrong people

And I still have a small scar on my back

As I was stabbed by a psychopath who claimed to be my friend

I find it hard to hold down a steady job

As I wear green tee shirts in my spare time

 

My name is Ralph

I was once a qualified accountant

But I fell into debt and committed fraud

Because of this and the amount involved

I was sent to prison for three years

You can guess that I find similar employment impossible

At present I am employed as a marshal

Who directs traffic at the main entrance to The Open

I also supervise six other people who in my view are not really interested

When I was in prison I began to take Holy Orders but let this fade

As I wear green tee shirts in my spare time

 

My name is Marie Ange

As you might guess I am from France

I work there as a actress although I have not been successful

My last film was called Titane which is French for titanium

It was a strange movie but I had a great time

At one stage the heroine who is also killer

Is impregnated by a car and finds that she is lactating black oil

I appear early in the movie and even have a few lines

The film I hope will be a success and I will be noticed

I hate this fucking job I hate golf and I hate my supervisor

Who is also a dyke and insists that I sleep with her

With promises of better opportunities

I am in a foreign country with little money

It was all my boyfriends fault he was such a cunt

I should have seen through him straight away

But I did not realise his intentions until it was too late

As I wear green tee shirts in my spare time