The comedy of my celebrity begins
I am a celebrity in the eyes of others
But I do not celebrate myself
I would like to castrate fools
But instead I share drinks with them
I am the lowest kind of traitor
Sometimes I wear summer dresses
I want to feel what it is like to be a woman
But I do not have a cunt so my story ends there
You can at once see the sun and feel its warmth
But what of love which you can feel strongly but never see
Both are common but love never reveals itself
I have a glass orb which I keep in a black dish
To the naked eye this glass orb seems black
But my brain knows that it possesses no colour
I have never won awards for my work
If by chance I was honoured by mistake
I would hang my medal around the neck of a soft toy
If you are walking through the corridors of a train
In the opposite direction to that of your travel
Where would you be between 16:26 and 16:27
If I was totally without sight
Would I be able to differentiate
Between a beautiful woman and an ugly one
My sister is very beautiful
I often handcuff myself to a radiator
When she takes a lavender bath
In my dreams I often see my lovely sister
Walking around my room in a suggestive negligee
Yet in real life she wears sensible pyjamas
Outlaw