Many years ago during my time as cleaner

I killed two men

The first was a prick who was working late

At the company offices of Tin Alley

I had just finished emptying the bins

When he threw his soda can into the receptacle

I ignored his idiocy until he called me across

Now I do not mind being called a circle or even a square

But hated being called a cross

He demanded that I vacate his bin

And when I refused he said he would get me fired

I hit him over the head dead with his angelpoise lamp

He fell to the floor without a sound staining the red carpet red in the process

I then finished my shift and read Vonnegut on the tram home

 

The second man I killed was the CEO of a Multinational

His office was on the penultimate floor of a thirty storey block

I had cleaned his office before and had noticed that he had a cuckoo clock

This I felt was little strange as cuckoos were not high altitude birds

On the day in question I found him arguing on the phone with a junior

When he had finished the call he turned to me and asked me to dust his cock

I did this without question but he then told me abruptly

To clean the birdshit out of the cuckoo clock as I was good for nothing else

As I moved towards the wretched creature I picked up his engraved letter opener

And plunged it deeply into his black heart

He staggered forward towards the plate glass window

Which should have prevented him falling twenty-nine floors but it did not

I then finished my shift and read Vonnegut on the tram home