28/06/2023
Hello Anna what is your name
Hello Anna
Hello Anna
Yes
Not really Anna is my last name
As Hello is a common name in Colchester
Ewally
You have spelt that incorrectly
No I have spelt it Ewally
It should be really
Thank you
As I said I was born in Colchester and from a very young age people would come up to be and say Hello Anna 2 me
And that is how I got my name
Although I dropped the 2 me later in life
IC
As you are aware I am interviewing you about your film career
I have never done porn you know
I see but what about Fun Things to do with Aubergines
I saw it in the Church Hall last week
It was a public training film
I sea
But it shows you pushing a huge aubergine up your cunt
As I said it was a pubic information film
Like what to do in the event of a nuclear war
That was the shortest film ever made
RUN
But using a aubergine as an organic sex toy is hardly in the league of surviving a nuclear explosion
Maybe but imagine just imagine that it is a hot day a really hot day and you are wet and horny
What can you do
Have a cold shower
No really horny your thighs are becoming chapped with your juices
What would you do
I am all ears
That is a nice name
I like it but they call me Martin for short
Well going back to the problem
You have wet thighs and you know if you leave them you will get a rash
And Germoline is so fucking expensive
You buy an aubergine from the local aubergine shop in the village
The rest is quite easy you remove the cucumber and insert the aubergine
That is why I agreed to participate in the movie
Where do the pearl necklaces come in
Pearl necklaces I was dressed as the Prime Minister
Have you boyfriend
Yes
What is his name
How did you know that
What
His name
You have not told me his name
No that is slightly wrong
Confused dot com
No
His name is
What is his name
His mum is called
Confused dot com
Or Dotty for short
I just call her D4S
Describe your boyfriend 2 me
Well he is about 1.75 tall
And is hung like a horse
I cannot sit down for a week after anal
Anal
Yes he steals all my chairs
He has the greatest breasts imaginable
A pert arse and is totally shaven
Totally shaven
Yes but only on Friday
Friday
My sister
She prefers his other name
And only has sex with him on Sundays
After Church
That is my other sister
I have never met her
That is because she is dead
Did she kill herself
No herself is still alive
Do you mind if I return to your latest movie
Do you not like Colchester
No I prefer your latest movie
How many sisters do you have
I am an only child
Tell me about the movie
What is it about
I do not have a clue
Yes
Go away clue this is my interview
It was about robots invading Colchester
What role do you play
The one in the bakers with all those irritating seeds
They get stuck between you teeth
Do you have any lines
No I am only twenty-three
Although I have a scar
Where
Not sure as I have never looked
How did you get it
It was always there
Have you seen your GP
No
Why
Because he is invisible
I asked my bruvver
He is very clever
That is a nice name
He told me that it is not a scar but a fault line under my Lady Garden
This me very happy
Very Happy
Yes
What does you character do in the movie
Nothing
Why
Because she is dead
What about you boyfriend
He had some lines
How many
I am not sure
Can you count
Yes but I have only seen him in the dark
What is the name of his character
Little Nell
As in Dickens
No Little Nell
Is he a freedom fighter against the tyranny of the invading robots
No
What does he do to stop them
Nothing
Why
Because the robot that he was going to do the sex scene with did not show up and the film company abandoned the movie
It was showing at the local cinema last week
Really that is interesting as the director told us both the fuck off and die as we were only extras
Did you take that personally
No it was mine in the first place