What is that Joe It is a pad and a blue pen What are you writing I am not writing I am talking to you Why are you in the bathroom Joe Because you are in the bath And I am talking to you It is going to be one of those days Joe What days The Joe being witty days But what are you writing Le testament de Joe Why in French I speak French Read it to me Once upon a time Seriously Joe I am recounting the story of what happened in a county town a decade or so ago What happened A woman was arrested by the cops Why You are using my flannel Josie It is my flannel Joe Mine was the red one we agreed No yours was the pink one No I think you are wrong Yours was the pink one I am no faggot Back to your poem Joe Why was the woman arrested Because she walked down the high street topless Really Yes Is that all she was arrested for Yes Did she give a reason for doing it It was a hot day She noted that there were a few men without shirts that day and the cops left them alone Did they warn her No she was arrested For what If I remember correctly for behaviour liable to cause a breach of the peace Was she attractive like me I do not have a clue She might have been a fat slag or a Josie in a bath I just read the report There were no photographs Was she fined No only given a warning Did she say why she did it Yes Why Equality Her reasoning was that guys and girls are supposed to be equal Men frequently remove their shirts and nothing is said But if a woman goes topless then she is committing a crime Is that equality No If the law banned men from removing their shirts then fair enough but it does not Is that the subject of your poem Yes and no My point is what is offensive and what is not As I said this happened a considerable time ago It never really caught on Too fucking cold in this country I agree Josie But a few weeks ago I was in the same town buying a book when I saw a pervert wearing a dress Was it a nice dress Joe Do not be trite Josie otherwise I will turn the cold water on Did it make you angry Joe I felt sick Were there others like you He was shouted at by a few decent people Especially with brats But overall he was ignored The thing that really fucked me off was that there were some cops nearby Why were they there It seems that some of the illegals were nicking stuff from the shops Or at least that was what I was told I am answering my own question but I take it that the cops did fuck all Spot on There was this pervert who was as tall as me walking down the same high street that the woman used before she was arrested The cops did nothing That is what sickened me And This chick with a dick was obviously mentally ill Men who do this are obviously misogynists narcissists and fetishists all rolled into one In theory they are dangerous people But the cops ignored this pervert If I had walked down the street wearing a SS uniform then they would have arrested me If you had walked down the street without a shirt it is likely you would have been arrested There is worse to come Can it get any worse It can Did you notice that when I returned I did not bring you a gift I did Joe and it was not good enough You know how quickly my vibrator batteries run out Use your fingers Josie it is much cheaper I was going to buy you some perfumed soaps French ones No African ones I do not like the African ones They smell of dead missionaries You would have received French ones Lavande Oui Citron Oui Violette Oui And many other flavours You like me smelling sweet It is better than fish Josie You are such a cunt Joe I do not want your perfumed soaps Fine with me Do tell me about the perfumed soaps Joe Well I normally get the soaps you like from Superdrug That is a bit upmarket for you Joe I agree But you like their soaps Well I had picked up three boxes and was approaching the counter when I saw the chick with a dick serving the customers On his name badge it noted his name as Claudia I just walked out of the shop And I did not get any soaps Do not be spoilt Josie You must realise that there are quotas Quotas my arse It is diversity and companies need to be seen as inclusive That is why you see trains and buses promoting sodomy and other perversions Instead of employing decent people they employ perverts When I worked in the Civil Service Joe I remember that they once employed a crip with special needs A great deal of taxpayers money was spent in adapting his work station He was from some God forsaken country and had issues probably due to inbreeding I would imagine You did not tell me this Josie I knew it would fuck you off Did he like football No Then he was probably a faggot He was He was fucking his support worker Groomed Very much The wheelchair probably got in the way That is very likely The wheelchair that was supplied by the state Enough Josie Do you know what the punch line is No The crip quit after a month or so He could not deal with the demands of the job Mary did tell me that the cost to the office was a fucking fortune Just to comply with malignant quotas All wasted A rather nice girl from Richmond replaced him Able bodied You would have fucked her Joe She had previously applied for the post but was overlooked in favour of the faggot crip That just illustrates malignancy of society today Did you contact Superdrug Yes And They replied with the normal shit The sad thing is that I am not a violent man You tell me you are dangerous In another sense All decent men are dangerous The difference is that they know how to control it But if required they can use it for the good Some men who are not dangerous are the weak ones They are although normally quite nice people just not useful when called upon As I was saying if I found out this pervert had been given a good thrashing I would not feel sorry for it They would have brought it on themselves You say the same about faggots I do These people bring it on themselves Joe The water has cooled We have been chatting for quite a while We have Pass me a towel No Why What are you doing Having a shit I am having a bath I can see that You are so gross A monster A savage It is your cooking Josie Well cook your own fucking meals I cannot cook You will not cook It is a girlies job Well this girlie is going to let you starve Bitch Where are you going Out of this room It smells like a sewer And open the window I will think about it Joe & Josie Go Boating