To all my friends
A question
How many of you masturbate at work
A quick trip to the gender friendly bogs
The Pleasure Palace awaits
But do clean up the mess
As the tiled floors
Can be slippery and dangerous
A recent survey noted
That over 40% of employees
Masturbate at work
10% in meetings
And 7% in their 121s
The split is roughly 70/30
(make up your own mind)
Senior Managers are more likely
To masturbate at work
Hence their job titles
I am a train driver
And masturbating at work
Is explicitly banned
As the cum goes all over
The windows of the cab
And obscures signals at danger
I am striking with my comrades
During the next month
Because of this infringement
Of our hard won freedoms
Somebody suggested female train drivers
But they often get hopelessly lost
The Euston to Glasgow express
Ended up in Truro last week
As the driver was on the rag
Which occupied her spare hand
Thank you for giving me the opportunity
To discuss this taboo subject
And remember
Always wash your hands
As others use
The coffee machines
After you
Just a little tip my friends
Silly Boy xxx