You have a habit of walking around our flat Wearing just a tee shirt before you retire I find this very off putting when writing Memo to Self Buy Jane a pair of pajamas tomorrow So that you might complete This wretched poem

Shipwreck Clinging to a sinking Piece of driftwood The sharks are circling I am praying very hard And hope that the sharks Have retained their faith

Do not criticise what you cannot understand What are you doing Listening to Dylan You Listening to Dylan

It is my moral duty To say that I am Heavy with Child Whether I am guilty or not Is of no importance As my foetus is innocent

I am hiding out in a hotel room High above a celebrating city The cops are searching for me As I am an ny assassin I have registered under my favourite alias F Anny Kaplan But the authorities are dumb I will not be caught As unlike other assassins I do not use guns or […]

This is not going to be a long piece Why should it be In short during the final months of the war I had rescued a wounded footballer As he stumbled towards the enemy lines Another rake of machine gun fire Would have finished him off He had been shot just above the knee And […]

I am standing where Dick Turpin Was executed In 1739 A blue bus Has just passed by Tyburn York Tyburn York Tyburn York Three Brothers Were aboard The blue bus I am having dinner With them This evening

Is that your real name Yes Why did you kill the minister Because Rory Red Was in Bed What was your reasoning I am an existentialist Even though my name is Sparkle Blue Are you a pony No a sea horse Why did you do it Because Mr Full of Holes Was corrupt A liar […]

Interview Good Morning Stuart Good Morning Maureen Mo It says Maureen on your badge I prefer to be called Mo That is strange as I prefer to be called SMO Those are your initials So they are I think we have connected I believe we have May I ask you a question Yes Are you […]

I was in North London today sitting on a bench When I saw a very beautiful woman Wearing a white blouseAnd a short brown skirt She smiled at me I smiled back She was carrying a book of my poetry And asked me to sign it I agreed but only if she would sign my […]