Little is known about Matheus Salte’s relationship With Lucy The Countess Von Teck As they corresponded for just thirteen years Before it was broken off by her husband Yet it left behind a legacy of over one hundred watercolours Which ranged from moonlit landscapes to dramatic storms From summer fantasies to commands of the Northern […]

I am standing quietly in The Gardens of Stanley With Tamara my dog This is my last week in Berlin

I am standing quietly in The Gardens of Stanley With Tamara my dog Many people stroll Through these gardens But do not wonder Of its English name I am a direct descendant of Oliver Stratten Stanley Who once owned a nearby house That was destroyed during the war These beautiful gardens Are all that really […]

“I t’ink”Said Hink-Y Dink,“I’ll take a drink I found this rhyme stuck To the shitty arse Of a half dead cat On Hampstead Heath It meant little to me As I have no interest In feline backsides But then I investigated its history It seems that when Michael Kenna died in 1946 He left some […]

The buoyancy of drowned men Is a subject not much discussed By priests over breakfast

All life revolves around The Black Bull Inn Today I was due to host A Poetry Slam Event But this will be dry As my delivery is late Due to an accident On the motorway The Black Bull Inn Is popular with city workers Including the neurotic ones Such as Lynn Acott Baimes (Lynn Ascot […]

Happy Little Trees Set In Threes Mask my Gothic House

I own a cafe that is part of an underground station It is very popular and was profitable Until about a year ago When a crip in a wheelchair complained That my disabled access was poor I told him that I did not cater for minorities And would not accept blind customers if they walked […]

Nina I went to a wedding recently That is nice I caught the flowers of the bride What luck Yes The next day I met Ralph at a bus stop And now we are engaged to be married Stephen My best friend died recently How sad He decided that he would attend his own funeral […]

Would you like a custard tart Peter Yes please And a coffee You are my girl Nilli Nell What are you reading La Peste Camus Oui Who would you rather fuck Camus or me You of course Why Because you have nice breasts Is that the only reason No Then why I want to fuck […]