I am silently judging your grandmother As we sit here on the terrace That overlooks the sea She has sadly lost her looks But the sea retains its beauty

Two rose petals are hidden in my diary I found them in your bed Beneath your breasts I long to be your lover

I am a sensible chap but on occasions I do stupid things On Wednesday I threw stones at a seagull on a beach in Kent Not realising that the bird had travelled from California To teach me about the unlimited freedoms of flight The seagull soon forgave me and helped me to realise That once […]

Jack was painting a still life He had chosen two apples One was green the other red Maggie was painting a still life She had chosen two apples One was green the other red Jack was painting from life His subject was Maggie She was holding two apples Maggie was painting from life Her subject […]

Julian Nagal once lived near a huge beach in Kent And each day after breakfast he would search the sands For sea shells and pebbles and other interesting things For many years he found nothing of note That was until he discovered two ships named Mary Celeste One and Mary Celeste Two He drew them […]

I was on the beach with my beautiful wife when a rather nice looking chap sat more or less in front of us At first I thought he was admiring my wife’s breasts as she always sunbathed topless This did not bother me as I have always considered that beauty should be shared He then […]

When I returned home from work my dog Rover was sitting in the kitchen He was silent at first but then started to discuss his knowledge of Ibero-Romance languages Rover always does this to me when he is hungry

Linda bathed three times a week Her bathroom had been designed by a Swedish architect To resemble a Stockholm metro station Her husband Peter was a chemist by trade And had designed each of the household soaps The soaps used in the bathroom were celandine yellow Linda loved the texture of these soaps But considered […]

For a few short days each year Cherry Blossom covers the nearby hills Its is very beautiful and soft to the touch I can see it from my railway carriage As I travel towards the humming city

We paid a farewell visit to June Canal yesterday as we were leaving our remote rural home She was as cool as I had expected and was relaxing in the sun when we arrived Our journey had been tiring and we had sheltered under the sleepy tow path trees I thought of this as I sipped […]